Sing for the moment

Timeline of last night:

8.30: Arrive at party armed with beer and Barbeque Shapes

10.00: Run out of beer. Go to combini and buy more. Open Barbeque Shapes. Theyre a hit with the four-year-old! Bask in success of Australian snack food glory.

10.30: Get lumped with an unwanted hoody, clock, box of Pocky and Nine Inch Nails DVD by soon-to-be-world-travelling party hosts. Nine Inch Nails DVD unsuitable for hosts adventures touring China. Unsure about hoody.

11.00: Go to local bar. Entertained by battery powered Hot Electric Rock guitar.





11.10: Realise Ive been in the bar for ten minutes and dont have a beer. Order beer, go back to Hot Electric Rock guitar

12.00: Start playing darts. Realise why I don't usually play darts. I suck. Several darts mysteriously vanish.

12.30: Meet Japanese local. He makes documentaries on whales for NHK! Impressive. Ask local if he thinks eating whales is OK. Answer is yes. Resolve to eat whale at first opportunity.

1.30: Bar runs out of beer. Switch to vodka.

2.00: Bar runs out of vodka mixers. Vacate bar and head to 24-hour karaoke place up the road. 2000 yen for all night karaoke with all you can drink! Brace myself for messiness ahead. Drink genki drink, buy Pringles from combini to smuggle into karaoke. They arent whale flavoured, though, but I'm not complaining too much.

2.05: Pringles successfully smuggled! I am a criminal mastermind!

2.15: First karaoke song of the night - Pump up the Jam. Table prevents Running Man dance occuring.

2.45: Gel's belting out a killer version of Wham! Rap. Realise that I do actually enjoy what I do. Resolve to listen harder to Wham! songs in future.

2.50: Debate ensues as to which song is better - Freedom by Wham! or Freedom '90 by George Michael. Am roundly shouted down that the Wham! song is superiour. Gel starts singing Freedom. Its not that good. Well, its OK. Not as good as Freedom '90.

3.15: Judy is a Punk! Except its skipped the first verse. Song now one minute long.

3.16: Judy is a Punk again!

3.50: Under Pressure! Gel is Freddie Mercury, I am David Bowie. Song a shambles aside from climactic finish and humourous "Ice Ice Baby" whispers. Resolve to practice song at home for next time.

4.10: Someones put on Number of the Beast by Iron Maiden. Its not bad, but am confused by relevance of accompanying video to song.



4.20: Im doing Downtown. Patchy version. Crowd participation lacking enthusiasm. I program it in again, hoping for a better response next time.

4.35: Downtown again. Apathetic crowd fast forwards the song. Shake my fist at crowd.

5.10: Bust a move. Realise my whiteness prevents me from singing convincing version. That, and I can barely see the words on the screen. No amount of raising the roof can save me. Song fast forwaded halfway through. Resolve never to try rapping again. With the exception of Wham! Rap.

5.30: Karaoke is over. Catch first train home.

6.00: Realise Ive actually caught the train to work, not home.

6.15: Change trains.

7.00: Home. Rest vocal cords. Gargle with honey and lemon like a professional. Wonder what to do with Nine Inch Nails DVD. Realise we didnt eat the Pringles. Bed.